Getting Fit

There I was exactly 2 years ago at size 20. Now on the right this is me now... 38lbs lighter and healthier at size 14. On the before picture I have the same sunglasses on top of my head, but somehow they look bigger on the after shot... guess my head shrunk in the process...lol Got a ways to go, but I am extremely proud of my accomplishments :)

My Story

I've always been a full girl. Since I was young I can always remember being "the chubby one". I never did mind though because I wasn't obese. I was full... even curvaceous :) However, by the time I reached my late teens it had all changed. 

I truly believe I am one of those cases in which PCOS developed at a very young age. I think I was about 10 when I first got my period. By age 12 it would come and go every other month. By the time I was in HS it would come about 3 times a year. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't say anything. I didn't want to get looked at "down there". Of course I was a virgin and very innocent. I didn't feel the need to be touched by a complete stranger. Now that I'm in my thirties I truly regret my decision. I regret not having the courage to speak to my mom about it. In reality, I didn't make much of it since it really didn't bother me not having my cycle. I could wear whatever I liked without fearing that I'd get a surprise visit. 

By 15 I knew I wasn't normal. I knew I had to see someone, but I didn't ask for help. It really wasn't until I reached my senior year in high school that it hit me. My hormones went crazy and somehow I began gaining weight (and hair in abnormal places). I began to feel ugly and closed up.  I began getting dark patches around my neck, abdomen, and chest. I finally decided to go to the doctor. When I got there all I was recommended was to go on birth control to bring back my period. I did for about a week and then it came. . .and after 10 days it wouldn't go away. My dad even took me to the doctor because he was seriously concerned and they referred us to county hospital. We never went as we didn't think it was THAT serious. I never took birth control again. A couple days later it went away naturally. 

By the time I was 21 I still had patches, my irregular menstruation was still irregular, and I'd steadily gained weight. 

I soon met Manuel, who's my hubby now and got married. I remember telling him that I wasn't sure if I could have kids. I remember thinking that I couldn't blame him if he didn't want to continue the relationship because I personally felt that kids were a big part of a marriage. He stood there and told me that he wanted to marry me. He said that if kids came he'd feel blessed and if they didn't he'd still feel blessed because he married a wonderful woman like myself. Needless to say, we ended up getting married later that year and have been happily married for 8 years. I told him everything that was wrong with me. But he accepted me just like that. By the end of the year we were married. We went through infertility treatment 3 times. Each of those times worst than the previous. I felt like a science project getting poked and prodded. I told my husband I was done. It was a horrible experience. He accepted and we haven't gone back to infertility treatment since. 

I have however been to the doctor to get myself checked out. Things have always come up normal... well, as normal as it could for me. Until I met this new Dr. who finally diagnosed me with PCOS. It's funny because I remember him reading up information from online as I was there. That's how unknown this thing is. Finally I knew what was wrong. Not that it's all taken care because it's not, but at least I know I'm not alone. He prescribed metformin and provera. I took it. They both worked. I guess., but I didn't like the fact that I had to take pills to regulate my body. He told me point blank that he'd only prescribe clomid (the medication to induce ovulation) once I lost 10lbs. So I went home. Ate healthy. Exercised. and came back to see him a month later. I had lost 6lbs. He said that wasn't good enough and that I'd really need to lose 20lbs. That was very disheartening to me. I couldn't understand why other "fat" women were able to get pregnant and I wasn't. I was very upset. I took what he said and did the opposite. I quit. I went back to my old "comforting" ways and regained it all back. By the time I realized what I was doing I was already even heavier. 230lbs to be exact. I never allowed myself to get heavier than that. THANK GOD! 

230 is a whole lot of weight for someone at 5'0. People say I never looked that heavy, but hey I was. I couldn't believe it. I let this happen. I was letting PCOS win. Not anymore. I remember attempting a hike in Griffith Park and I couldn't do it. I got shin splints almost immediately. It got so bad that I couldn't even walk. It was a darn shame. So I cried. and Cried. and cried. And finally decided to change. I'm not gonna sit here and tell you it's easy. Because it's not. It's hard. Hard a fuck! But I changed my way of thinking. Last year at 30 years old I realized I was on a path of self-destruction. I realized I love myself too much to keep hurting myself that way. I finally put my ass on check and have done everything to become a healthier person. I'm not gonna let this PCOS win. So in December I made a promise to myself. I set goals for myself. I said "I can look better than I did in high school... I will do it". Now in HS my lightest weight was a good 150-160#. That's still a lot for my height, but I looked freakin' good. I'd love to be that weight again, but I'm going for ultimate health, so I've set a healthy weight of 125#. I'm happy to report that as of January 1, 2011 I've lost:

                                             Created by MyFitnessPal - Nutrition Facts For Foods

How have I done it? Well, I began trading in that Pepsi for water and going for 2-3 mile walks. It's not a lot and really, you'd be surprised how short 2-3 miles really are. I recently began syncing my walks/runs/cycling with "dailymile":




It took a while to see the first set of pounds come off, but when they did... they melted off. Some weeks are easier. While others are really difficult, but I take them as they come. I honestly feel great. So good that I don't want to quit. I like feeling like I'm winning. I'm finally winning. I definitely want to try infertility treatment again. The difference this time is that I'm informed. I now know what my body can and cannot handle...those are things that I didn't before. . . and that makes a huge difference...I know I got a ways to go. I know I slack off. I know it's hard. But I also know I CAN DO IT! So if you're going through a similar situation have faith in yourself. . .give it your all... remember you gotta do this for you... love your body....

By the way, I love technology. I use my iPhone to track what I eat and when I exercise. Apps I love (in no particular order) are:

• Lose It!
• TargetWeight
• WalkMeter (or RunMeter, CycleMeter; they're all the same exact app)
• Nike+GPS
• BodyShot
• NikeTraining

There are many more, but through the year these have made the cut.